Ahjune’s Weblog

The Worst Moment In My Life

Posted on: September 11, 2009

I was reading my cousin Xin Lian’s Blog & there was one entry where she mention she went to apply for the Masters program & she was shocked at how blunt some representatives are with their remarks.

Somehow when i was reading it, it suddenly brought back some bad memories when i had to repeat my O’s.

Well i did really badly & my dad didn’t want me to repeat my O’s @ a private school so i had to go back to my secondary school.

When i reach the school, i saw my principal & i was told to look for Miss Soh (HOD for chinese @ that time) to get the form as she’s the one in charge. And so i went to find her @ this classroom where she was teaching her students.

I really had to drag my feet in & get the form from her. And guess what happened!!!!!! I don’t know for what reason but she just start lecturing me in the classroon in front of everyone (there should be about 30+ students) & insult me in a very bad way.

She says things like “I remember you were a student councillor & how can you fail your O’s” , “By the way, we had a few criteria so it doesn’t mean if you can come back if you want”, “And you being a student councillor, how can you fail your O’s & you are showing a bad example”!!

Stupid Bitch (pardon my language as i usually don’t say all these but all these words just came into my mind when i think about her)!!!!!   If  i had a knife in my hands @ that moment, i may have stab her already!

And the worst thing thing was when she told me this “By the way, i don’t have the form with me so come & find me later during break time!”   WTF lah…. You stupid OLD HAG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I really want to pick up a chair & throw it @ her!

At this moment, my heart was really filled with anger & i really don’t deserve this kind of treatment!!

When i walk out of the classroom (i was @ the highest level of the school) & i got a urge to jump down but i don’t dare.

Then i ran all the way down to find my mum who was waiting @ the canteen for me. By the way, i bump into 2 teachers (Miss Yap my chemistry teacher & Mr Ng who was my chinese teacher) when i was running down the stairs & they actually bother to stop me & ask if i’m ok & what happened. But i said nothing.

Anyway it was useless talking to my mum as she has no idea what to do & can only say that we have to listen to dad. I was crying really badly.

Next thing i can remember was i think i called my 4th aunt for help. After this i can’t remember much as i was really upset & somehow managed to get the application done.

And the next 6 months in school was also a horrible time for me! I didn’t want to talk to anyone @ school. 

Every night i cry myself to sleep.

Every morning  i will wake up VERY UNWILLINGLY to go to school… Tears flow when i was on my way to school.

During recess time, i will find a quiet corner @ the volleyball court, eat my lunch & cry @ the same time.

I was happy when it was time to go home & then i will cry again in the shower.

I don’t know who to approach to talk about my problems.

But luckily i’m glad i got a group of caring friends & family. But i do need time to recover which i did eventually.

I just failed my O’s & it’s not a crime!  I’m usually a very jovial person & this nightmare kind of took away a huge part of my jovial self which over the years i also slowly gain it back.

Actually i thought i got over it already but last month i was @ Peishan’s place for dinner & when we talked about the school days, i start to break down. But it was because i was thanking Peishan & a few other friends (i was in their class when i had to repeat my O’s) who helped me a lot.

Anyway it feels good saying this out. It’s like lifting a heavy burden off my chest.

I do know what i’ve experienced may not be the worst thing that can happen to a person but it was indeed quite a traumatic experience for me. Maybe my life has been pretty smooth for me so when i’m faced with a major setback in my life, i can’t cope well.

And i hope by telling you my story, you will be strong if you have to face any problems. I’m trying to get stronger too =)

Anyway i’m now having a happy life & i’m surrounded by my loved ones & great friends. And by posting this entry, i hope it also means it marks an end to this unhappy past of mine.

Before i end this post… Just want to share a quote with everyone!

“Never let life’s hardships disturb you … no one can avoid problems, not even saints or sages”
(Nichiren Daishonen)


9 Responses to "The Worst Moment In My Life"

@ big hugs @

how can that person be even a teacher?!?!?! how can she be so hurting.. but that was how it was during our time… we don’t dare to talk back.. unlike kids these days. I can empathize with u as I was humiliated and outcast by a teacher for almost a year in Pri 5. Can you imagine.. i was only Pri 5 and she had to rule me out of the whole class of 40 girls. perhaps i will write an entry on that one day. even though i have put it away, i have not forgotten how she treated me 😦

Hey… Thanks for the hugz! *hug you back too*

Didn’t know that we went through something similar. And i agree that during our time, it’s hard for us to speak up unlike now! I may have sue the teacher already. I guess it’s hard for us to forget everything totally! Haiz…

What have we done to deserve this from them! And i can’t imagine how you got through for that whole year =( Really poor thing… Hugz!

HUGS those were tough times. but now ure happy so dun worry! hehe keep smiling! hehe we are all here with u! (:

Thanks Xin Lian!! =) Hugz Hugz! Don’t worry… I’m ok! Just want to say it out & i felt a lot better. I guess it must have happened for a reason & it’s over already.

And i am HAPPY now!! =) Thanks to someone dear like you & also to those who care a lot for me. I know i will never be alone =)

yes! u will NEVER be alone (: hehe just rem that!

=) Thanks & hugz!

And yes…. To those who like to torture their students, please switch to other jobs! But to those Good Teachers out there… Please keep up the good work & don’t give up on your students especially those who need more help! =)

I was watching this Channel 8 show 星期二特r写 & they featured the stories of some teachers who have different past & how they overcome everything to become a good teacher now! I was very touched & cried when i watch the show.

omg…yea i remember in singapore i was realy scared of the teachers and dont say anything. If it was nnow i would have made her quit…lol like im trying to do with one of my lecturers now….argh some people….really arent meant to be teachers! dont worry june! im sure she has lost her job by now!

haha indeed. some are just meant to be in another profession. teachers who have zero empathy ought to just switch jobs! haha (:

Thanks Qirong… Hugz! I don’t care what she’s doing now! Haha… I just hope she didn’t do that to another student!

And you are right… During our time, we can’t do much to the teachers unlike now! But then again… Nowadays the students & their parents can be too much too! Totally the opposite from our time!

Btw what problem do you have with your lecturer?

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